Saturday, June 12, 2010

The Lemon Demon Inc.

The first company I ever owned was in Second Grade. I had a Lemonade Stand which was made from a Cardboard Box. There were a few glasses, a Jug and I took some Lemons from the Refrigerator.

I named it The Lemon Demon Inc. Demon rhymed and sounded scary! I had plans of making it the biggest Lemonade Stand chain in the world.

Anyway, I wrote the name on the box with a marker and added the price. There was an evil face under it. That was the Demon. The box was placed on my lawn and I was ready for my first customer.

After ten minutes of waiting, a huge kid arrived. On looking closely, I realized it was Bobo, my bench mate.
"A Lemonade Stand? I'll have one..."
"Okay. That would be 25 bucks..."
"25 bucks? No thanks. I almost forgot. Pay me 50 cents."
"What? Why?"
"I stopped by your Lemonade Stand."
"You need to pay me..."
"Why should I give you my Money Bobo?"
"Its to Let you live through School fund..."
"Sounds like a worthy cause to me. Here..."
, I gave him a cent and button.
"Hey this is a button..."
"I know. That's worth 49 cents and you have a cent."
"I knew that. Bye."

He fell for that lie. As long as he realized the button wasn't worth 49 cents, I was safe. Bobo waved and left. Even before I could start my Big Business, I had a loss of a cent and a button.

Many people stopped by my stand. They stared at the price and the evil face. They looked at me next and left. Mr. Neighbor was my next customer.
"A lemonade stand. Very nice."
"You want some?"
"Yeah sure... Wait a minute. 25 bucks?"
his eyes almost popped out.
"Put it this way - Just 25 bucks?"
"Yeah? 25 is too much kiddo. You can always give me a free glass. I am your neighbor, remember?"
"Sorry. I forgot. Let's make a deal. How about 24 dollars?"

Mr. Neighbor gave me looks and left. I had lost another customer. I was having a loss. So, I decided to cut on expenses. I ran home and brought back another jug with water.

After a few minutes, my brother arrived. He was at home and wanted to see how my Lemonade stand was going on.
"25 bucks a glass?"
, he yelled. His eyes almost popped out too.
"Yeah. Want some?"
"25 bucks a glass?"
"You already said that. Want some?"
"How do you justify charging 25 dollars for a tiny glass of Lemonade?"
"Demand? I don't see any demand. Thanks to your stall and this street looks like a sequence from a Horror Movie."

There was nobody around. Maybe, all the people who stopped and stared at my stall, informed others to not walk this way.
"There was a lot of demand a few minutes ago. Mr. Neighbor purchased two glasses."
"What? Maybe, he got hit on his head with a brick to buy two glasses. Or he's just crazy from the beginning. Anyway, where's the Lemonade?"
I pointed to a Jug of water with a lemon in it.
"You call that Lemonade?"
"After the recent ups and downs in my business, I had to cut on expenses."
"Why does that water look all brownish?"
"Mom uses that jug in gardening..."
"You mean that's dirty water? What if I got sick drinking that?"
"We have the Extra Special Lemonade for those Health conscious people. A glass of that would cost you 30 bucks..."
"Great! Good luck with your business. I'll be at home drinking something else."
"Go ahead. Its people like you who ruin jobs and business plans. Thanks for coming!"

The door was already shut. My dream of having The Lemon Demon Inc. all around the world was shattered. Maybe, adding the evil face wasn't a good idea...


  1. Oh dear, better luck next time. Maybe you need to work on a few things before you set up again like market pricing and branding? Great post have a good day :)

  2. Now I know why you are poor in Math. 25 bucks can straight away shoot to $25.
    Your biz can be submarined or skyrocketed.
    Very cunning story! Good Luck!

  3. Hey, at least you have an entrepreneurial mind at a young age which is good. UMMM...your business skills just need fine tuning but not to worry, that's what college is for!

  4. fun first business...
    fresh start...
    you will prevail on other business such as creative writing and more soon..keep trying.

  5. hahha...cute...
    Very creative to use your mom's gardening jug for lemonade :P

  6. Good try......great idea. Lemonade rocks..

  7. It could have worked, just look at Starbucks!

  8. awwww tried my tried...

  9. I think u confused them w/the prices.. lol... My kids and the neighbor kids had a stand... back then they would allow rocks as payment... crazy huh? The kids were lucky enough to have passerbys just give them money... guess they looked super cute or super needy? lol

  10. ...i have a feeling you should have looked into the cause of the brown water, too! ah, the lemonade cost the parents a ton of money so that the kids can make a buck fifty ;) you see, you didn't fare much better than that either! can't wait to hear the next story :)

  11. It sounds like you had a sound business plan. It's too bad no one bought into it :) In theory, you should be the King of The World by now! Your business plan wasn't much different from what's used by a lot of successful businesses.

  12. LOL!!! I loved reading this... And the name "Lemin Demon Inc" is SOOOO catchy !!! Great !!!

    Too bad all you got were bad customers!

  13. I don't really see a future for you at Trump Inc., unfortunately.

  14. Wrong time and place!
    Today's market and depending on where you are people would be paying for that lemonade!

  15. This is an utterly hilarious post, you had me laughing from start to finish. I just don't think suburbia was ready for cutting edge businesses like the Lemon Demon Inc. (great name, by the way!), maybe some day, you'll break into the market :D

  16. Maybe two lemon slices would've made it a winner.

  17. Your missed your target group that would have brought the huge profits..the demons..he he..just kidding!! :)
    Lemon Demon can still make good profits outside the wrestling matches! :)

  18. You had an Extra Special Lemonade for Health Conscious People way back in 2nd grade? Wow. You were certainly a progressive thinker back then. :-)

    25 bucks a glass sounds like quite a bargain. I'll have a dozen, please. And the mom's dirty water flavoring would really add something wonderful to the taste, too.

    Actually, after seeing how businessmen act these days, you were actually a good businessman. Price gouging. Offering a shitty product. Catchy advertising. Yep, you had it right. lol.

    Funny post, dude. Take care.

  19. One of the primary rules of business - you can't charge more than the market will bear. :)

  20. Definitely a case of you needing to find cheaper quality supplies - possibly having sufficient capital to invest in bulk buying before opening the stand.
    Still, the story is well told. It was easy to visualise each of the people and their reactions to your stand. Thanks for sharing this.

  21. This made me laugh and laugh : )
    I hope you have gone on to much better things : )

  22. Lol, I am surprised more people didn't think that you were drugging them by and name and evil face.

    Peace, Love and Chocolate

  23. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only person ever that didn't have a lemonade stand...

  24. nice idea and try.

    now if you would have made pink lemonade, that would have definitely made you some money. although judging by your track record, im not sure how you would have made it pink??... or what you would have named it??

  25. It started out as such a good idea too. My 8 yr old really wants to have a lemonade stand. I told him he might have better luck selling the golfballs back to the golfers that lost them in our yard.

  26. This is so darned funny. Mr. Stupid, that was truly genius. (The post, not the request for $25 lemonade.) Nicely done, sir.

  27. Maybe you could have instead opened up an eyeball catching business. With all those eyes popping out, you could have charged them $25 to get them back ;-)

  28. What a great post! You had the right idea and the right name too, I must say, but I guess the prices were a bit off.:)

  29. I was hooked with Lemon Demon. That is a marketable brand...

  30. Hi Mr Stupid. Be a while before I drink any lemonade again!

    I have an award for you over on my blog :)

    Bearfriend xx

  31. thanks for great smiles , always a fan of your wonderful writing and you already are a successful writer take care

  32. Hahaha, you demonic lemonade sales man! =) I love lemonade and I would come buy your stand, just to amuse myself and donate ten cents for your humor generosity. Keep smiling, Mr Stupid!

  33. haha. yeah i imagine it was the demon that scared them away...lemonade is the bomb though...but 25 must work for some other companies i know..smiles.

  34. i loved running a lemonade stand as a kid. so much fun.

  35. Lemon and Demon don't rhyme or is that the point? You were trying to be cute?

    Tough break on your failed business.

  36. I can't believe nobody bought any. It could've been good - to kill weeds, as fertilizer, or, well, there's gotta be something. Better luck next time, and thanks for the laughs - as always.

  37. I wish I could have seen your customers' faces when you said the Lemonade was $25. Priceless!!

  38. From where are you Mr. Stupid? I demand you answer me honestly and I'd pay you 25 bucks!!! Right here and now!!!

    Lols...I wonder where are you from, just tell me and we can be good friends... :D And I'd help you make that business yours a hit worldwide...:D

  39. So is that where the moniker of Mr. Stupid is derived? ;)

  40. Although $25 is a steep price to pay, with all your reasoning (?) behind it, it's a shame the stand never took off. The name alone is worth at least fifty cents! ; )

  41. Typical. You come up with a fabulous plan to dominate the world with a Lemon Demon franchise and what happens? No one supports or believes in you, that's what! Philistines! :P

  42. It's all about marketing . . . maybe you should give it another go.

  43. Were these fresh squeezed lemons? If you'd known about organic back then, some might've fallen for it, especially if your sign also read "rich in omega 3's. It's all about supply and demand.

  44. Aw, I'm surprised your company didn't go global! :D

  45. I might have given you $25.00 just for your originality!

  46. That was hilarious. Put a broad smile on my face after a long and not such a good day! :)

  47. wow!! very interesting business. i once tried selling popcorn at the end of my driveway but i lived on a dead end. my grandma paid the next door neighbors to go buy some otherwise, that was all of my business. oh, some ants took a few peices but rudely didn't pay. sounds like neither of us were ment to be road side vendors.